Josie Whip, makers of high quality custom paddles and floggers, have just released their Summer Catalog. This issue features my latest essay, “The Mythical Domspace.”
Maybe it’s easier for outsiders to understand why a dominant would want to be in control — for better or worse, the desire to have power over others seems instinctive to the human animal. At least in my opinion, this means that more has been written examining the perspective of the submissive. There seems to be an intense desire to understand what a person could get out of giving up control, out of voluntarily letting another put their will over one’s own. As a result, phenomena like subspace are relatively well documented, and there are a lot of essays assuring the reader that much of a kink scene is about getting the sub’s needs met, even implying that the top is secretly in service to the bottom. I’d like to take a few words to examine what the dominant gets out of it all, on a deeper level than just getting off.
Read the rest of the article.
Previously, I’ve written another essay for Josie Whip entitled “The Paradox of Kink.” I also got to review one of their floggers which remains a favorite toy to this day.