This was originally written for a sex blog that died shortly after I submitted it. Now you can enjoy it here!
If you’re reading this you probably enjoy sex toys. But these days many of us are on a budget. Maybe you spent all your sex toy fund on a fancy new Lelo vibrator, but you’d still like to be able to redden some bottoms when things get a little freaky. Here are a bunch of kinky items I found on a recent visit to my local dollar stores.
1. Clothes Pins
Clothes pins are a classic toy. Attach them to nipples and other curvy body parts. Remove them after a while and enjoy the added sensitivity. These things hurt, but with a little ingenuity you can adjust the tension on them, or even attach adhesive foam or rubber padding (which might even be available elsewhere in a dollar store). Just don’t leave them on too long for safety’s sake.
2. Kitchen Toys
Many kitchen tools are pervertible. Spatulas and wooden spoons are the most obvious answer, dishing out truly wicked spankings. There is little that can leave a mark as well as a wooden spoon — which can be a good or a bad thing depending on who you are playing with. Metal tools like frosting spreaders not only pack a wallop, but can also absorb the temperature of a cold freezer for some extra sensation.
Hairbrushes give a very mean spanking, and they have a very special place in many submissives’ hearts. After all, they are often what “real’ spankings are given with — so clear it with your lover before you break this out: I’ve known a few who couldn’t handle them and many more who loved them (or loved to hate them). They add a definite spice to any masochistic scene, and that’s not even getting into the potential roleplaying aspects. No kinkster’s collection is complete without a good paddle-shaped hairbrush (or three). The label may say ouchless but that’s not what their bottom will say!
Lots of people have fantasies of having their clothing cut off of them. With a pair of scissors, some crappy old clothes, and some care, you can fulfill this fantasy. For added fun you can tie the lover down then cut yourself some ‘access holes’. Just make sure you have permission to destroy that clothing, first!
5. Child’s Jump Rope
There’s lots of rope available at dollar stores, but it’s terrible — plastic, slippery, and with a tendency to fray and shed little pieces of plastic rope all over your lover and your bed. So forget rope. Travel instead to the children’s section, where you’ll find this little number. A piece of 7′ children’s jump rope comes in a number of vibrant colors, is tied off at the ends with plastic handles, and will enhance your age-play roleplaying. It might not be the right length for adult jumping, but it’s just the right length for some simple adult tying, like this wrist binding.
Honorable Mention: Knee Pads?
Seriously, these are for gardening?
You never know what you’ll find in a dollar store. In fairness, these days a lot of the stores (including one of the two I visited to write this article) expect you to pay more than a $1 for the especially juicy items. Some of the hairbrushes I looked at were as much as $4. Even so, if you’re only planning to use it for kink, you’ll find a lot to play with. You might even find some hardware to hang your toys or create tie-down points in your bedroom.
Dollar stores are only scratching the surface of course — don’t overlook the infamous Home Depot (a.k.a. Dom’s Depot), Michael’s, and other big box stores for all your budget BDSM needs. I know a woman who filled an over-sized pink duffle bag just with paddle-shaped objects she bought from every department at WalMart. A little creativity goes a long way.
When your lover wants to make things a little wild (and maybe a little sadomasochistic), you can equip your toy chest without breaking your wallet. Sure you’ll be happier if you can afford to spend more money, but some days a cheap prop is just the thing.
Update 03/08/2011: Check out this follow-up article, 5 Kinky Toys From the Office Supply Store.